writing to control

Sometimes I feel like I'm losing grip with things, with work, with people, with life, with reality even; control is not within my hands anymore as many factors are moving around.

I wonder if writing is a way to regain control; or at least a sense of control - a little bit of logical comprehension of reality around me. Perhaps the lack of writing in the past half a year or so has led to the sense of disorder, the feeling that I can't keep up with anything anymore.

Or perhaps things are indeed getting a bit much.

It seems that we are constantly living in total chaos, only masked by our own deception of an orderly front, crafted so elaborately by what we hear from people more powerful than ourselves, and what we want to believe in.

After all, it is not about exerting control or making sense of everything, but perhaps just enjoying the chaotic flow of things without breaking into a thousand pieces while going with the flow and drifting in a fun manner.